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Rediscover Your Inner Child

The Inner Child has a powerful presence and it dwells at the very core of our being. Imagine a healthy, happy toddler. As you picture this child in your mind’s eye, sense its aliveness. With great enthusiasm, it constantly explores the environment. It knows its feelings and expresses them openly. When it is hurt, it cries. When it is angry, it screams. When it is happy, it smiles and laughs from deep down inside. This child is also highly sensitive and instinctual. It knows who to trust and who not to trust. This little child loves to play and to discover. It gets into everything. Every moment is new and full of wonder. From this playfulness comes an inexhaustible wealth of creativity and spirit.

As time goes on, the child runs head first into the demands of the adult world. The voice of grown-ups, with their own needs and wants, begin to drown out the inner voice of feelings and instincts. In effect, parents and teachers say, “Don’t trust yourself, don’t feel your feelings, don’t say this, don’t express that, do as we say, we know what’s best.”

Over time, those very qualities that gave the child its curiosity, spontaneity and ability to feel are all forced into hiding. In the process of raising, disciplining and educating children, adults often turn the child into a very predictable adult. By eradicating the child’s vulnerability, along with its lack of control, they severely damage the essential self of the child. The baby is, in effect, thrown out with the bath water. The adult world is not a safe place for children. For the sake of survival, the growing youngster sends its delightful child spirit underground and locks it away. But that Inner Child never grows up and it never goes away. It remains buried alive, desperately waiting and wanting to be set free.

The Inner Child is constantly trying to get our attention, but many of us have forgotten how to listen. When we ignore our true feelings and gut instincts, we are ignoring the Inner Child. When we fail to nurture our body and soul, we neglect the Child within. When we talk ourselves out of childlike needs with the excuse that they are not rational or practical – not the adult thing to do – we abandon the Inner Child. For instance, as the movie showed us, we may feel a sudden impulse to run ‘barefoot in the park’, or to cry inconsolably over the loss of a dear friend. This is the Inner Child wanting to come out, but when the serious grown-up inside us says, “No, you can’t do that! Big boys don’t cry. You must always be in control,” the Inner Child ends up firmly locked away in the cupboard.

When our Inner Child is blocked, we are robbed of our natural spontaneity and zest for life. Over time this may lead to low energy and even chronic or serious illness. When our Inner Child is hidden we also separate ourselves from others. They never get to see our true feelings or hear about our heart-felt wishes; they never see us for who we really are. This makes it impossible to experience true intimacy with others. We never get to truly know each other. It is the Inner Child that holds the key to intimacy in ALL relationships, to physical health, energy and well-being, as well as enthusiasm and creativity at work. An active and healthy Inner Child is one of the best preventions for burn-out and disease. It is the source of humour, play and rejuvenation – it is the very spice of life.

Rediscovering your Inner Child isn’t optional – it’s imperative! It means allowing that Child to really be who it wants to be, i.e. to be itself, and to allow it to happily dwell in our hearts. For us to be fully human, the Child within must be embraced and expressed – without it, we constantly struggle to find peace, and carving out a life filled with joy and wisdom will forever elude us. Make friends with that little Kid inside and see what happens…

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