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Unfinished Business?

 

As we see All Saints’ and All Souls’ Day come and go this 1st & 2nd November, I am truly comforted, as I remember, at this special time every year, what a true force of nature my father was …..formidable Formuj! Forthright, forever-focused, with a “fortune favours the brave” attitude that all those around him could only envy!

I love this time of year: Halloween and the Day of the Dead…..truly a time for celebrating the lives of our departed loved ones……certainly, not a time to mourn.

Whilst living up to the expectations of such a father wasn’t always easy (err?!?… the understatement of the millennium, me thinks!!!), my grief-stricken anguish at losing his influence during the early days of his passing, would often get the better of me. What I realise now, is that he’s actually still around …….supporting me with his presence, in spirit-form.

Now, before you all head off to exit this blog, thinking that the strange times we’re currently living in, have finally tipped me over the edge, believe me, they haven’t!

When it comes to grief, there is no right or wrong way to do it. Our reactions and our experience to our grief, regarding the loss of a loved one, is as unique as our fingerprints. No two relationships are alike, they are totally unique, and so the experience will be unique, too. Such a process is incredibly personal, and even though we might share similar emotions to others, there is no common order, no pattern that follows…….our grief is ours alone, and respecting this is so important.

If we attempt to fit our grief into a framework, we end up in conflict with all our natural instincts. Trusting our feelings is key, and what is right for one, may not be at all right for another. We must never question our emotions – they turn up to protect us, believe it or not, however awful they may feel at the time.

Losing a loved one is bad enough, but what happens if it becomes more complicated through issues remaining unresolved or important discussions never having taken place? Left with unfinished communication and with the awful realisation that it’s too late to repair the relationship, anger can manifest to the point that it becomes all-consuming……and with the person now gone, how do we direct and channel that anger for good? Do we choose to live under a cloud of lost hopes? Not at all!!

2020 has been a totally unique year, with its Blue Moon offering infinite possibilities for the future! As the saying goes, some things happen only once in a blue moon, i.e. hardly ever, and I have a feeling that something “one-off” is about to happen again, if it’s not already done so!

Energy cannot be created, nor can it be destroyed – therefore, energy never dies – and spirit is energy! Too many strange things have happened in recent years for me to ignore the power of my father’s influence, still very much around, guiding and guarding me! If you’d have asked me, back in 1996, the year he died, if any of the above were true, I’d have laughed you out of the room! …….but, not anymore!

100%, there is an invisible FORCE at work – maybe it is the force of Formuj, maybe it isn’t?? Who knows? All I know is that it absolutely exists …..and don’t ask me how it works, either, I only know it does!

So, can you feel the FORCE? Believe in the impossible, for the REAL THING, it most certainly is!!!

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